Saturday, March 26, 2011

Chocolate Bonds

Financial innovation and returns have never been sweeter and more delicious (literally, really) :D
The company has issued bonds for which the coupons are not paid out in cash, but in chocolates :)

Funny business quotes

  • Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor. John Ciardi
  • The problem with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat. Lilly Tomlin
  • Don’t piss on my back and tell me it’s raining. Old West quote
  • When you assume, you make an “ass” out of “u” and “me.”
  • The successful man is the one who finds out what is the matter with his business before his competitors do. Roy L. Smith
  • Eagles soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
  • Every employee rises to the level of his own incompetence. The Peter Principle
  • Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion. Cyril Northcote Parkinson/Parkinson’s Law.
  • The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.
  • A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him. David Brinkley
  • A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
  • She should go far. The sooner she starts, the better.
  • The higher a monkey climbs, the more you see of its behind. Joseph Stilwell
  • Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence. This explains why we have so many stupid leaders. Sloan Wilson
  • The wheels are turning, but the hamsters are all dead.
  • Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.
  • I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig, you get dirty; and besides, the pig likes it. George Bernard Shaw
  • If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you’ll get change.
  • There’s no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it? Kin Hubbard
  • If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
  • There’s an enormous number of managers who have retired on the job. Peter Drucker
  • By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. Robert Frost
  • Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties. Doug Larson
  • Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. Winston Churchill
  • A budget tells us what we can’t afford, but it doesn’t keep us from buying it. William Feather
  • The worst part of success is to try to find someone who is happy for you. Bette Midler
  • Success is relative. It is what we can make of the mess we have made of things. TS Eliot
  • If you would like to know the value of money, try to borrow some. Benjamin Franklin
  • Don’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. George Burns
  • If not controlled, work will flow to the competent man until he submerges.
  • If you don’t know what to do with many of the papers piled on your desk, stick a dozen colleagues initials on them and pass them along. When in doubt, route. Malcolm S. Forbes quotes
  • It is better to spend money like there’s no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there’s no money. PJ O’Rourke
  • Never invest in anything that eats or needs repairing. Billy Rose
  • It’s hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse. Adlai Stevenson
  • If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it. WC Fields
  • Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings, they did it by killing all those who opposed them.
  • If at first you don’t succeed, failure may be your style. Quentin Crisp
  • Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.
  • A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
  • All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure. Mark Twain
  • If at first you don’t succeed, try management.
  • Indecision is the key to flexibility.
  • If at first you don’t succeed, take the tax loss. Kirk Kirkpatrick
  • Aim low, reach your goals, and avoid disappointment. Scott Adams/Dilbert
  • Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes. Lewis Grizzard
  • The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. Oscar Wilde
  • In the early days all I hoped was to make a living out of what I did best. But, since there’s no real market for masturbation I had to fall back on my bass playing abilities. Les Claypool
  • Do not underestimate your abilities. That is your boss’s job.
  • Right now, this is a job. If I advance any higher, this would be my career. And if this were my career, I’d have to throw myself in front of a train. Jim Halpert/The Office
  • Success is simply a matter of luck. Ask any failure. Earl Wilson
  • Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. Napoleon Bonaparte
  • There’s nothing so improves the mood of the Party as the imminent execution of a senior colleague. Alan Clark
  • A consultant is someone who takes the watch off your wrist and tells you the time.
  • An expert is someone called in at the last minute to share the blame.
  • Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.
  • For maximum attention, nothing beats a good mistake.
  • One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important. Bertrand Russell

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Lift kara de

I overheard a very interesting conversation while in a lift. I heard one guy saying: The lift takes more energy to take a person going down than a person going up. The logic is that the lifts usually have a big counter-balance attached to it. The counter-balance always goes in the opposite direction of the lift. If the lift goes up, the counter-balancing weight goes down and vice-versa. So while you and the lift has to go down, the heavy counter-balance has to be lifted and hence is very energy intensive. So the next time, walk down and go up in lift to save some electricity.